I don't know why...but sometimes i feel we are not fit together...sometimes we are not comfortable with...where this feeling come from??? I feel something very different with this whole month...Last night i in needed..today i won't need it...my feeling always change without any reason...maybe because i pregnant...ya...i ever read it...pregnant woman will always have such that feeling...me also don't know how to describe this feeling...plus...i feel unsecured..not safe..alone...and one thing actually i really feel is...the mark that leave after i give birth to aqil... i not the person who forgive and forget...is not that easy for me to accept it..even in 10 years or til i elder...who knows..in my condition right now..make me cannot forget about everything...i ever try to forget...but the scar always show up to my face...i can't take it so easy in my life...or maybe it's me..make it harder to face on it...huh..really feel not accepted..and...i cannot make it word on what i feel right now...it just want to share with you all how i feeling in my 12 weeks pregnant...turst me...i also hate those feeling...no love, no sexuality, not talking to each other, it's simply like a worse life....sometimes i feel not matured, sometimes i feel useless, sometimes i feel lonely, sometimes i feel my life was stole by somebody, sometimes i can't accept who i am, where i are, what i supposed to do and don't, ACTUALLY...WHO IS REALLY ME NOW...?????
Habis dah luahan rasa...esok mesti lain plak cerita...~~~~Wonder, is that the feeling every pregnant women must have???
Adious Amigos
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